Tuesday, May 9, 2023

Performance Anxiety Strikes

 I do love to play my horn. And performance opportunities are great - a chance to play for people, motivation to practice and delve deeper in the music... but also the possibility of stage fright, so to speak.

The concert band that I am a member of had a concert on Sunday. The last piece on the program was a medley from Wicked and "Defying Gravity" was a horn solo. It wasn't incredibly hard, but it wasn't easy either. And I haven't seen Wicked. (I know, I'm perhaps the only person in the country who hasn't seen Wicked. I haven't seen Phantom either.) So I looked the song up on youtube and listened several times. 

Problem number two: I am a classically trained musician. The style of pop music is very different than classical music, say Mozart, Brahms, Strauss, etc. Pop music, like Wicked, has certain rhythms and phrasing that you have to both read carefully and feel, or you don't stay with the rest of the group.

At the first rehearsal I bombed it all over the place. I went home and not only practiced it, but listened to it on youtube, and had my band director husband coach me (which he was delighted to do!). It was much better at the next rehearsal and I continued working on it with my husband at home.

Nevertheless, I was very nervous. And it was the last piece on the program, which for a brass player means tired lips. I carefully paced myself and the rest of the horn section supportively covered for me when I laid back in pieces before Wicked.

In the end, though I was nervous, I was able to relax and enjoy playing the solo. It's making music that is so rewarding and I think that I was able to do that. 

Whew!

8 comments:

  1. Congratulations on nailing your solo. I think that some people who don't play an instrument don't realize that different kinds of music require a different mindset and playing techniques.

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    1. Thank you! That's very true - I have friends who are big fans of various types of music and I usually don't understand what they're talking about!

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  2. Wow! I love reading about conquering stage nervousness! You are a performer and that takes guts! You had a husband and YouTube as coaches...and the willingness to tackle a different genre. Brava!

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  3. I love how you share the complex emotions of preparing and performing this piece. You tube and your husband are great coaches!

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  4. Making music is perhaps one of the best things. Love that you practiced and played the solo!

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